Fat Stat

Statistics from the India Pakistan semifinal clash (and others)

* 260: The estimated heartbeat rate of Indians when Shahid Afridi was batting.

Also: The runs that India managed to score (Pakistani goodwill gesture inclusive).

* 19: The number of wickets

Also: The number of times Rameez Raja would've gone on air saying, "That was a timely wicket - taken at just the right time."

Also: The number of times Wasim Akram wondered why Shahid Afridi didn't take powerplay.

*1500: The number of runs that Misbah ul Haq had to score per 100 balls to win the match for Pakistan when he got out.

Also: The number of text messsages I sent and recieved throughout the match

* 0: The number of sixes, fours or runs that Yuvraj Singh managed to score

Also: The number of fans who believed Pakistan would win when Misbah was playing a gem of an innings.

Also: The number of Tests I dream of playing.

*11: The number of players Dhoni could ever dream of playing in his side.

Also: The number of fours that Sachin struck.

Also: The number of times Dhoni wondered why Ashwin wasn't picked in the playing 11.

*04: The number of times Sachin was dropped.

Also: The number of times Aamir Khan was shown on TV.

Also: The number of minutes Indian PM and his Pakistani counterpart spent shaking hands with the players.

*09: The number of times Sachin has got Man of the match awards in world cups.

Also: The number of fours Sehwag thumped from the Pakistani bowling.

Also: The number of times Afridi wondered why on earth he got out.

*152: The score that Sehwag would've had if he played 100 balls.

Also: The number of times I got warned by neighbours for noise pollution.

*02: The number of wickets each Indian bowler got.

Also: The number of times Sachin wondered whether he was himself, while batting.

* 73.91: The strike rate of Sachin Tendulkar's 85

Also: the percentage of bets I won.

Also: The percentage of people who changed channels when Yuvraj was out for a golden duck.

*69: The number of runs Umar Gul conceded.

Also: The runs Sreesanth would have conceded if picked.

Also: The minutes spent by Raina wondering why Pakistan never knew his weakness for short pitched bowling

* 26: The over in which India lost two wickets, Yuvraj for a golden duck.

Also: The over in which Yuvraj took the first of his two wickets.

Also: The total runs Pakistan gave India away as a goodwill gesture.

10 replies that suggest a person doesn't know Internet

# 1. Do you use Yahoo?

A: Yeah, but I prefer Hurray, instead.

#2. How good is Bing?

A: Yeah, ping pong is a good game! It helps you increase your powers of concentration.

#3. What about Facebook?

A: Oh, don't remind me of that! I'm done with my exams! Forget it.

#4. Do you surf?

A: Yeah, but I don't have a passion for it as Matthew Hayden does.

#5. Did you see RottenTomatoes' review for Inception?

A: Oh, what did that organisation do? Did they sue the film-makers? There wasn't any monkey business in the film.

#6. How well do you know about Pirate-bay?

A: I've heard of Hudson Bay, Bay of Bengal and others. Where on earth is Pirate Bay?

#7. Do you use Google Chrome?

A: Is that a new product in the market? I'm good at guessing. That's a dye, right? I've not tried it. How much is it priced?

#8. How long does it usually take for a mail to reach you?

A: It depends! The postman who delivers for us is usually drunk. You can't trust him!

#9. Can you send me a song via Gmail?

A: I don't understand why you are fussy about Gmail. Can't I send it through Fedex or Bluedart?

#10. Wikipedia is good. How much is it useful for you?

A: I've got a copy of Brittanica Encyclopaedia. Do you think I'll have to buy a copy of that too?

Saint Patrick's Day

A random check of the mails throws upon me a question, "Do you celebrate Saint Patrick's Day?"

The bug in me compounds the query with newer ones.

So what is Saint Patrick's Day, anyway?

A: It's more of a day of feasts, a day of pride for the Irish. 17th of March, it is celebrated on. Green colour it is synonymous with. It is on Saint Patrick's Day that Chicago river runs green (Paint it green!). A specific Wikipedia search will get you more trivia.

How do I remember Saint Patrick's Day?

A: Oh, not a big deal. A bit harsh, though. Wasn't it on the Saint Patrick's Day, 2007 that Pakistan lost to the Fighting Irish? That was a very good day for those advocating Green, maybe. I remember Rameez Raja guffawed, "there's definitely an edge!" and the replays showed that there was a feet's gap that separated the bat.

So what has that got to do with you?

A: It was on St. Patrick's Day, 2007 that Irish cricket team finally came to the fore. Bob Woolmer was dead in no time. And for Indian cricket fans, India had lost to Bangladesh, embarrassingly. Yet, to see their Arch-rival go down to the Irish meant less 'embarrassment', less mockery of India's performance at the world cup.

Alright! So what have you got to say now?

A: Saint Patrick's Day wishes! Enjoy a drink with a cassette of the famous Irish win. Visit Chicago river. Swim in it and turn up green the next day for work.

Cheers,

Gopsay